Wrecking Us Saving You Read online

  “You know, you’ve both changed, it takes time to adjust. Learn one another again.” He cocks his head.

  “I hear ya. I’m trying to take my time, I am. She’s just so amazing, everything I’ve ever wanted. I have no plans of ever hurting her or Silas. I love them, they’re my life.” My heart hammers against my chest. It may appear we have no idea what we’re doing, but destiny knows all.

  “Sarah?” I can’t believe this shit. “Sarah?” I hope I don’t wake Silas up, I forgot to grab a towel. There’s a light tap on the door as it cracks open.

  “Hey, what’s up?” Sarah says softly through the opening.

  I poke my head out of the curtain. “I need a towel.”

  She giggles. “Oh, let me get you one.”

  I step out onto the rug, taking a step toward the door when Sarah bounds through. Our bodies clash, and my arms wrap around her as the towel falls to the floor. She grasps my biceps, sending shock waves through my body .

  “Your towel,” she murmurs with hooded eyes. And there it is, just like chemistry, our intense attraction flares like kindling.

  “I’m getting you wet.” My pulse purrs to life as she sinks her teeth in her lip.

  “Yes. So wet,” she says with a ragged breath as her eyes dart to the tattoos on my body.

  Her lips mere inches from mine, as her heart beats beneath my palms. Our gazes locked, time stands still. I see my life in her blue eyes. “Sarah, I need you to leave.”

  She nods, trembling. “Going. Now.” I release her, and she backs into the door and it shuts. Her eyes roam my body, a frenzied desire igniting us both.

  “Sarah...” Her eyes snap to mine.

  “Going now.” She jerks the door open, glancing over her shoulder as she closes it. “Glad to see drinking all that milk paid off for ya.”

  “I got your milk, lady,” I mutter, fisting my hard cock. “I know dude, I know.”

  I slip into my clothes, brushing my teeth to remove the fur coated on them. Thank fuck I didn’t kiss her. I shove my things into the bag and head to the couch. Sarah’s sitting in the chair next to it, pillows and a blanket stacked beside her.

  “I hate you’re going to sleep on this old thing, it won’t be comfortable,” she says as she chews on her nail.

  “I’ll be fine.” I drop my bag by the door. “I appreciate y’all letting me stay. I need to give One a call, let him know what’s up.”

  “You want me to step out?”

  I slump into the couch, patting it. “No, I want you to move that sweet ass over here. Why are you so far away to begin with, actin’ like we’re strangers.”

  She quirks her brow. “I think we’ve become reacquainted at this point,” saying as she sits beside me, holding a book.

  “What’cha got there?” I ask, pulling up One’s number.

  “Silas’ baby book, I thought you might like looking through it.” Her eyes sparkle with the mention of our son.

  “I’ll make it quick.” I hold up my phone, hitting the call button.

  “Man, I’m about to kick your ass. What is going on?” One growls as he answers.

  “Hey, good to hear from you.” I laugh. “I’m good, gonna stay the night with Sarah. I’ll be home sometime tomorrow afternoon.”

  “Is she coming with you?” One’s still speaking quietly.

  I turn to Sarah, raising my brows. “I haven’t asked.”

  “Why the hell not?” He has a point. “Is she close?”

  “Right beside me, why?”

  “I’d love to say hi, we’ve missed her.” One’s voice cracks.

  “One wants to say hello.” I put the phone on speaker and her forehead creases.

  “Hey, One.” Her words no more than a whisper.

  “Sarah, it’s so good to hear your sweet voice. How are you, baby?” Her eyes glisten.

  “I’m okay.” She swallows. “I hate I left the way I did.”

  “As long as you’re okay, that’s all that matters.” One sighs.

  “Like I said, I’ll see you later tomorrow.”

  “I guess I can take a hint. Sounds good, brother. Love you.” We can hear the sound of a cooing baby in the background.

  “Give the babies a kiss for me. Love y’all.” Sarah’s gaping openly at me. “What did I do?”

  “You haven’t changed, none of you. I thought your family would hate me, after all these years.” She twists her lip between her finger.

  “I told you. So what’s in this book?”

  She scoots closer, leaning into me so that we’re shoulder to shoulder. “Silas. His life to date, basically.” She giggles, opening it carefully.

  “He’s so tiny.” I move in to examine his newborn photo.

  “Tiny? Tell that to my hooha.” She giggles. “He was eight pounds and ten ounces, not small in the least.”

  “Your what? Hooha?” I laugh. “I guess he wasn’t so small.” Silas’ name is written below the picture. “Jordan, huh?”

  “I loved the name Silas but Averette didn’t sound right with it. That’s when Jordan Lake came to mind, Silas Jordan.” She grins.

  “I agree, so much better.” We turn the page to his birth certificate, and I run my finger over his footprints.

  “His foot is huge.” My chest swells thinking of him.

  “Remind you of anyone’s you know? Try keeping him in shoes, it’s a never ending process.” She laughs.

  “Sarah Sutton Hamilton?” I glance at her. “I thought you changed your name?”

  “Mom had fake stuff made. I have a birth certificate and social security number with the fake name on it. It was so we could move around and get jobs. When I gave birth, I used this name. It’s a tiny white lie but it was never caught.” She winces.

  “I see, they thought you used your middle name.” I nod as I notice no father’s name is given.

  “We weren’t married, so I couldn’t add your name.” She grips my hand. “Again, I’m sorry.”

  “Stop, please. I think you’ve used ‘sorry’ enough in this lifetime.” I squeeze her hand, smiling at her.

  We spend a few hours going through the album. She kept a lot of his things, documenting anything she could. Closing the book, she peeks up at me through her lashes.

  “I didn’t want to miss anything.” She chews her lip.

  “I love it, thank you.”

  “Oh gosh. It’s three in the morning, I need to let you get some sleep.” She slides to the edge of her seat, placing the book on the table. “Silas gets up early too, so we should get some sleep.” She stands, crossing the room. Pausing at the hall, she turns to me. “You’ll be here, right?”

  “Right here.” I toss the pillow behind me. “If you leave the door open, you should be able to see me.”

  She glances to the door. “Yeah, okay. Goodnight.”

  “Night.” I wait for her to go in before settling down.

  I toss and turn all night, the thought of leaving them tomorrow wracking my nerves. I stare at the album Sarah made for Silas. I’ve never given consideration to what would happen if I found her. I assumed we’d be together.

  Sitting up, I pull the book open, taking my time to study each picture. Sarah is still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met; eighteen years hasn’t changed my feelings for her or her beauty.

  I can’t leave them.

  The sun dawns, streaming through the window. Sarah’s blonde hair is radiant, she’s angelic. Silas snuggles her, his wavy, dark brown hair sticks up like twigs in every direction.

  He’s cocooned in the blankets, leaving Sarah in her sleepwear. Her legs bare, the shirt is pushed up her stomach, leaving her round bottom skimpily covered with white cotton.

  “You know, voyeurism is illegal in the lower states,” Luke whispers from his door.

  “Fuck, you scared the shit outta me.” I step toward him. “Do you ever sleep?”

  “As much as you do.”

  “I’ve got so much shit in my head right now, honestly, I stopped sleeping year
s ago.” I rub my hand over my face.

  “I suppose about six.” He gives me the once over. “Just ask her, you know she’ll go.”

  “She’ll go where?” Sarah asks from Silas’ door.

  “Y’all gonna give me a heart attack, sneaking up on people. Damn.” I rub the tightness in my chest.

  She giggles, walking closer. “Seriously, go where?”

  “Home.” She blinks rapidly, rooting me in place. The silence sits in the pit of my stomach like a rock. I knew it was too soon, what was I thinking?

  “Silas too?” I could count the hairs on the back of my neck as they stand on end.

  “We’re a package deal.” I give her a lopsided grin as I count the beats of my heart pounding. Her glossy eyes gives me hope.

  “If you’re sure?” She nods, trying to convince herself. I’m already there.

  “Positive. How can I help y’all get ready?”

  “We need to pack a few things. What time do you want to leave?” She bites her lip.

  “Last night?”

  She laughs. “I’ll get our suitcase, then I need to get him up; he didn’t bathe last night.”

  “He’s fine, I can help.”

  “Really? Alright. Now, where to start?” She spins on her heels, heading to Silas’ room.

  “Grab a suitcase and you start packin’, I can help Silas shower.” My stomach flips over and over. Like I know how to bathe a kid?

  “Silas, wake up. Baby Boy, rise and shine.” Sarah rubs his back, rousing him up.

  “Good mornin’, Momma.” He rubs the sleep from his eyes, and my heart thrums.

  “We’re going to Chord’s house for a few days. Would you like to go?” she asks him as he stares at me. He gives me a boyish smile, and I wink at him.

  He scrambles across the bed, leaping from the end toward me. I catch him on the fly as he throws his arms around my neck. “Let’s do this.”

  “Shit! You scared me, Silas Jordan.” His eyes grow wide, and his mouth hangs open as he turns to me. I mimic his face.

  “Momma said a dirty word.” His eyes dart to her.

  “I’ve heard her say worse.” Sarah’s face flames as she turns her mad mom face on me.

  “Chord, so help me.” She points at me. “Silas, no more jumping. You two get in there and get cleaned up. I’ll pack our bag.”

  Silas’ lip puckers. “We’re in trouble.”

  “It’s okay, I’ve been in trouble with her before.” I wink.

  “How’d you get out of it?” His brow quirks.

  I can’t stop my smile as it broadens. “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”

  Sarah’s face is a deep red as she narrows her eyes at me. “You are in so much trouble, just you wait.”

  “Uh-oh,” Silas and I say in unison as we giggle. I take a step back to leave the room, but Sarah looks up at me and I hesitate.

  “What?” She stands straight, her hands on her hips.

  “What do I do?”

  She quirks her brow before it dawns on her. “Turn the shower on, double check it for the temperature before letting him get in, then just wait on him. Remind him frequently what to wash, boys tend to let the water run on or splash in and call it a bath.” She giggles.

  I shrug. “Sorry, it’s new.”

  “You and me, we got this.”

  “Are you okay with stopping to see my family?” I glance at her to make sure she’s not opening the door so she can jump.

  Her head nods a few seconds before she answers. “What about Silas?” Her fingers go immediately to her mouth. I reach over, taking her hand in mine.

  “They’ll be happy to see you both.” I lay her hand on my thigh. “I just need to call, let One get everybody there.”

  “I’m scared. Like, freakin’ out.” Her hand trembles against my leg.

  “We can wait.”

  She turns to me with her shy smile. “Always thinking of me, you’re too good to me. We can do this.” She laces her fingers with mine, making my pulse race.

  “I want to prepare One, he should know.” I kiss the back of her hand, returning it to my thigh. Picking up the phone, I give One a call.

  “’Bout damn time, what’s up?” One’s like a mother hen at times. Or is it Mother Hubbard?

  “I’m about an hour away. Is there any way you can get the family together over at Mom and Dad’s?”

  “You know I can, but why? They’ll want to know.” He’s right, I still make him sweat it.

  “I don’t plan on telling this story a hundred times. Call everyone, even your tribe.” I snicker.

  “Fine. An hour?” he asks.

  “Yes, please. I know it’ll take that long for you to load your bus of kids up.” I smirk.

  “Asshole. We’ll be there.” I drag a deep breath in, gathering my courage.

  “One, I’m bringing Sarah.”

  “That’s great, seriously. Why do I feel a ‘but’ coming?” He knows me too well.

  “We have other news. I want to tell everyone at once, but I need someone to be prepared.”

  “I’m listening.” My stomach knots.

  “When she left, she was pregnant, but she had no choice but to leave. We have a son. I found my family, One.” A wave of emotion crashes over me—fear, anger, happiness, and love. Sarah reaches over, rubbing my thigh.

  “Chord, you were so devastated when she disappeared. I wondered about this, your tenacity to keep looking. Your love never wavered, I admired you for it.” One’s voice cracks as I try to get myself under control.

  “I love her even more now. I know it sounds impossible, but I’ve waited all this time and now I have them.”

  “I’ll read the riot act to everyone, tell them no questions and reassure them that you’re doing good.” One sighs. “And congratulations, little brother.”

  “I knew I could count on you, thank you.” He ends the call.

  “How are we gonna tell them?” She puts her other hand in her mouth.

  “Do I need to tie you up?”

  “Excuse me?” Her eyes are wide when I glance over.

  “Your hands, you’re chewing on them. Should I tie them together to make you stop?”

  “I’m sticking with tie me up and you can take it from there.” She waggles her brows. I grow rock solid as heat rumbles through my body.

  “You’re gonna make me wreck.” She grabs her belly, laughing loudly. “You’re not even right.” Her eyes dance when she reaches over, smashing her palm into my face.

  “Poor baby, I’m sorry.” She forces her bottom lip out, eyes wide, trying to look innocent.

  I hold my face, pouting. “It’s on. I have three days’ worth of stubble. That hurt like hell.”

  She sticks her tongue out at me, and I pretend to go for my zipper. Her mouth pops open as I laugh this time. “You are terrible.”

  “Stick that tongue out again, baby.” I adjust my cock. “I got something for it.”

  “I know you do.” She swivels in her seat, peeking at Silas. “Thank fuck he’s asleep.”

  “Sarah!” She slaps her hand over her mouth.

  “Not even a week with you and my sailor mouth is back.” She narrows her eyes.

  I plaster on my shit-eating grin. “I like it dirty, baby.” She slaps my arm, her mouth hanging. “Hang on, I need to get my zipper.”

  “I refuse to talk to you another minute.” She puts her palm up toward me, spinning around to stare out the window.

  “Minute’s up.” I gig her in the side, and she squirms, trying to get away from me.

  “What am I gonna do with you?” She snatches my hand, holding it to her chest.

  “That’ll work for now.”

  She releases my hand, pushing it away. “You’re driving me crazy.”

  “You like it.”

  “I love it. Now watch the road.” My heart races when she smiles at me.

  Pausing at the gate, I enter the lock code and wait for them to open. My parents’ home comes into view with a ho
st of cars in the drive. “Looks like everybody is here.”

  “Wow. How many people are we talkin’ about?” Sarah’s eyes bug out as she takes it all in.

  “One’s older kids drive, so it’s still just those I told you about.” I pat her leg.

  “So what’s your plan, Stan?” She bites her lip with a nervous giggle.

  “Want me to go in and give them a little warning? You can wake Silas up and talk to him. Maybe prepare him for the number of people.”

  “I like that, sounds great.” I jump from the seat, waving as I walk around the bumper to the front door.

  I take a ragged breath as I turn the knob, strolling into a houseful. “Hey, y’all. Where is everybody?”

  “Kitchen!” a chorus of voices calls out. I stride into the room and heads turn.

  “Is everyone here?” I scan the room as Mom comes to stand at my side. “You might want to sit down, Mom.”

  “We’re all here.” One leans against the counter.

  I take a long, deep breath. “I went to Charleston Friday night to support Alden, and while there, I found Sarah.” Gasps fill the room. “Now, I know y’all have a million questions but there’s plenty of time. She’s with me. We have several things to tell y’all, but I want to first ask you to give us time. We’re still working through some things. I’m gonna go get her.”

  A low rumble fills the room as I jog back out to get the two loves of my life. Sarah’s standing beside Silas’ door, fidgeting. “You’re perfect, the both of you. You ready?”

  She blows out the breath she’s been holding and my stomach knots. “If the butterflies in my belly would settle down, I’d be good.”

  I help Silas down, and we take his hands, one on each side. As we enter the kitchen, Silas slips behind Sarah. I never thought he’d be as nervous as his mom. He clings to Sarah’s hand, hiding.

  “Hey, y’all.” Sarah waves. My mom is the first to run to her, pulling her into a big hug.

  “Oh, Sarah. Honey, have we missed you. You look amazing.” She hugs her again as Sarah battles her falling tears. Silas peeks out, gasping. “Oh, who do we have here?” Mom squats, getting on eye level with him.

  He steps out from behind Sarah, and Mom’s eyes shoot to mine on a gasp. “I’m Silas.”